Because most people are trying to fix a symptom rather than a problem. Most new year’s resolutions are things like quitting smoking, losing weight, saving money, or working out at the gym. You can never fix a symptom, if you do it will just show up in a different way.

Let me use an example to explain…

The problem isn’t that you need to lose weight (you may disagree but read on) The problem is that something makes you feel hungry when you are not. That food makes you feel better when things aren’t going so well, that it gives you a pleasure that you aren’t getting elsewhere in your life.

That chocolate cake gives you something that you should be getting a different way. Maybe you are in a relationship that is in a rut or in a dead end job with no satisfaction. Worse, maybe someone around you is bringing you down, who doesn’t believe in you. Is it your partner, your boss, or even your family?

If you can solve the cause, the chances are the weight would fall off naturally. How many people know someone who got really slim right after a divorce or breakup? You can make all sorts of reasons why it happens but maybe it is because they solved the cause of their unhappiness and didn’t need to feed the problem.

Now, I am not suggesting that you leave your partner necessarily. The problem may be that communication is stopped, that you don’t even feel you know them anymore…then maybe the answer is to get reacquainted. To make a real resolution to discover what went missing.

New year’s resolutions detract from the real problem. The real problem is that there is something fundamentally wrong with something in your life. 

Is there a forgotten dream? Have you given up the ideas and ideals of a younger you. Too many people have given up what they want because it seems too difficult. Make a resolution today to pursue that dream.

Maybe it is that you feel there is no time for what you want or other people have to come first.

As a life coach the one thing that is true of every client I work with, is that at the beginning they feel what they want is impossible to achieve. Later they cannot believe how far they have come. But even after they have done such great things, they find it hard to believe the next goal is possible.

I will always be puzzled how we can all forget what we are capable of. All you have to remember is how many times they said “it can’t be done” and were wrong.

“There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.” — Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp. (DEC), maker of big business mainframe computers, arguing against the PC in 1977. for more quotes from people who didn’t believe

That is why I am a life and business coach. To show people that it can be done. To believe in them when they can’t believe in themselves. It scares people to find out that they CAN and some are not ready for it. ARE YOU????

For more about doing your best see this inspiring video

Inspiring you tube video to illustrate how we can sometimes do more when the end goal is removed. Please stay to the end, it will be worth it.

(as a side note American Football field is 100 yards to the end zone)

We can always do more than our best and I have seen that fact proven time and time again

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”

~ Winston Churchill

It is easy to play the victim. To say “I tried and tried and just couldn’t make it work”.  But I am telling you now, that is an excuse. How hard did you try. How many times did you fail? Only once? That isn’t enough.

Strangely it is the failures which will usually give you the much needed information to succeed.

Let me explain:

Let say you are a salesman. You work on commission and need big sales to make good money. Most people would make a list of their ideal clients and start with those. My advice is save those till last.

First call the potential clients who don’t matter as much. Find out how the system works. How do you get past the receptionists and PA”s? Ask them outright for help. It doesn’t matter if you feel you look stupid. Remember this is a fact finding mission. If you are doing it right, you are learning jargon, best times to call, certain phrases that work. You are failing on purpose to gather more information and build confidence so when you come to the companies that matter you are more relaxed and have a system that is more likely to succeed.

This will work with anything not just sales. The military calls it  reconnoissance  (r-kn-sns, -zns)

It makes you re-evaluate your challenges

One of the great career questions you can ask yourself is: ‘What skill, if honed to perfection, would have the greatest practical impact on my career?’

This is a great question to ask wherever you are in life. It might be improving your computer skills, learning how to make presentations, better planning, networking or focusing on finishing tasks properly.

If we’re honest, we all know what could move us on career wise.

A great way of getting honest feedback is to ask your partner, friends  and workplace colleagues what could make you more effective.

Yes, it may be a little embarrassing to ask but you’ll know where you stand and the best thing is that all business skills are learnable as long as you want to learn them.

Marcus Aurelius was an interesting man. He has the distinction of being the only Roman emperor who was also a philosopher.

Aurelius captured his thoughts on life in Meditations, a series of writings that are as fresh today as when they were originally written more than ..?.. years ago.

It proves that good advice like ‘live each day as if it were your last’ is timeless.

Another example is Roger Bannister breaking the four minute mile – a feat that many doctors said was impossible – and the emergence of digital watches in the 1970s that, for a time, vastly outsold traditional watches.

Why don’t you challenge a accepted ‘truth’ in your life that might not be all it seems? Ask yourself why you think that, where that belief came from and if it’s relevant any more. You could really surprise yourself.

Thinking positively and see what can happen…

The people we choose to hang out with have a huge influence on how we see ourselves so it makes sense to seek out those who support, encourage and inspire us to new heights.

Associate with people you admire, like and respect because that magic will rub off on you.

Don’t settle for second best with friends and think hard about why  you’d want to hang around with a negative, pessimistic  person instead of positive one. Go on, stretch yourself!

Innovation  can be difficult. Setting a system in place to tackle a goal can help bring new ideas.

Management guru Brian Tracey has got a great ‘mind storming’ technique.

Get a blank sheet of paper and write your goal/problem at the top of the page. Make sure your goal is specific and stated in the personal, positive and present tense.For example, instead of just saying ‘I want to earn more money’ write down something like “I want to be earning £50,000 by April 2012.

Next, write down a minimum of 20 possible solutions. You’ll find this easy to start with but around the 15 mark you really have to start digging deep and that is where some of the answers might surprise you.

Once you’ve competed your list go back over it and select one idea that you can take immediate action on, such as a telephone call, arranging a meeting or sending an email.

It is important to do this the same day. You can work through/filter your other responses on subsequent days.

Try using this technique first thing in the morning and have some fun with it. It’s a real mental workout that forces to you to stretch yourself in the search for solutions.

a trainer or instructor a tutor who prepares …

That is the dictionary’s definition but to me it is so much more. I want to encourage people toward changes that made the difference between living the life they want rather than living the life they were given.

Life is a series of choices but sometimes people, because of their upbringing, can’t even see that there are other options. The funny thing is I don’t think people really know or believe that they can change.

I think they have made New Year resolutions and seen how they fade to nothing. They don’t understand the hidden energies inside them. The blocks that stop them from making a difference.

That is my job. I show them what can be done and empower them. Then they are always shocked how quickly things change.

I hear so many times things like, ‘I would have never believed this time last year I would now have…’ you fill in the blank.

Life coaching can help with any problem. My clients are changing careers, buying homes, starting businesses, losing weight, and finding real loving relationships.

They see they have the power to change and once they get a taste of it, they go wild with it.

I am not saying all changes come easy. At first it can be really difficult but then there is a huge snowball effect and it gets easier and easier.

The important thing is that there is someone there on your side the whole time, someone who is not emotionally invested in your life and has no agenda but making your dreams come true.

People who come to me need to be ready for change.

I mince no words. I tell them the truth as no one else in their life can. But I also show them a different way and believe in them and that by itself is really powerful.

“Reflecting on everything you said – most pieces are falling into place now- it has helped me understand so much!” C.S.

see more testimonials here